True confessions time...I am addicted to reality shows. Yes, I know I should raise my sights and watch things that are more uplifting and more intellectually stimulating (and I do...) but I admit that I have this strange attraction to watching "real" people as opposed to scripted, laugh-tracked robots. Of course, we all know that there's not really alot of "real" going on in some of the so-called "reality" shows, but I find that I gravitate more toward the talent type programs...like "So You Think You Can Dance," or "America's Got Talent" and particularly "American Idol." It's fascinating watching folks, just like myself, take a chance, put themselves out there, and dream about their shot at fame.
Also (and I'm definitely ashamed to admit it...) it's interesting to watch some of the people who really shouldn't have taken the chance. You know who I'm talking about...the ones who have absolutely NO talent whatsoever, but are so clueless, they show up, expecting to walk out with a multimillion dollar contract on the spot. It's often funny but also often painful, to the point of squirming, to see just how truly lacking in any talent some people can be without actually realizing they have no talent. Of course, I always REALLY wonder about the ones who show up with a multitude of family and friends in tow, cheering them on even as they totally humiliate themselves in front of America. Are these loved ones ALL that tone deaf or blind that they also can't recognize how lame their auditioning friend is...or are they secretly just really mean and want to see them go down in flames? In either event, it's a bit like watching a car wreck, knowing that you really should avert your eyes and not look at the carnage...but unable to turn your head because it's SO mesmerizingly awful.
But you know the ones that TRULY amaze and apall me? In every show of this type, there are always a multitude of spoiled, ugly, arrogant applicants who, when turned down for a spot, go out the door shouting, screaming, flipping the middle finger, spewing vulgarities, and swearing that the judges don't have a CLUE how utterly awesome they are!! I mean, 15,000 people show up for the possibility of receiving one of only a handful of "golden tickets" and THESE fools rant and rave because they didn't happen to be one of them? Even if they had a tiny measure of talent, the very fact that they totally turn into cursing lunatics when they don't get their 15 minutes of fame proves that they weren't really up to the job in the first place.
WHEN did we all get the idea that there are no losers in life? How did people, particularly our younger citizens, come up with the concept that they should ALWAYS be first, always win, always get things their way, and never have to face adversity, trials, difficulty, loss, or failure? Have we become such a lazy, self-centered society that we have completely taken it to heart when Burger King tells us we should "Have YOUR Way?"
In a sea of 15,000 voices, sitting around in a stadium, in one of a dozen towns where 15,000 more people will be sitting around in each of them, what gives someone the unshakeable idea that THEY are guaranteed to waltz into their dream future?
There was a time when loss, failure, adversity, trial, difficulty, and just plain NOT getting everything we wanted was what made us who we are. We worked on developing CHARACTER and MORALS and EXPERIENCE instead of instant fame, wealth, and noteriety. Now, instead of a good reputation and a compassionate heart, we'd rather have a hit show, best selling film, or platinum album...at ANY cost. Not quite sure that's true? Watch one episode of "The Bachelor" and follow the exploits of a dozen attractive young women who are totally willing to prostitute themselves and degrade themselves for the "affections" of a man they don't even know...a man who is having his way with every single one of them in sucession and then tossing a couple aside every episode while working his way down to the "dream girl" that he'll propose to...and then toss aside in a few weeks when he realizes he doesn't have a clue who SHE is either.
Here's the REAL part of reality: We don't always win. We don't always get what we want. We are going to fall down, skin our noses, have our hearts broken, cry alot, lose alot, stumble often, and possibly never, ever quite reach our "dreams" before the end of our lives. On the other hand, if we learn from our losses, are content with what we have, pick ourselves up when we fall, heal from our wounds, open our hearts, dry our tears, and understand that our "dreams" are goals we strive for, but not absolutes that we MUST achieve in life...then, at the end of our days, we will look back and see that we became good, caring, strong, loving, sucessful, happy people who made a difference in the world and left it better for us having been in it.
Reality doesn't always have to be about US...
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Saturday, January 30, 2010
A Different World
Last night, when I went to bed, the first few little flakes of a predicted snow storm were just starting to fall. It really didn't look like it was going to turn into the significant event the weatherman was predicting...just a dusting, like powdered sugar, on the ground...a couple of tiny crystals in the air catching the light every now and then. Outside, the world was still a typical winter night, cold, dark, and dead.
It's a different world this morning. The view out the window is all white...clean, pure, amazingly white as far as the eye can see. I have to admit that the weatherman got this one spot on! Snow is still pouring down, even as I write. Sometimes, it's coming in bursts of rapidly falling flakes and at other times, huge flakes, big as quarters flutter down, taking their own sweet time to hit the ground. Minute by minute, it piles up, covering everything in a thick flocking of the whitest white there is. I went out to sweep the back door step a little while ago and the snow is so powdery and delicate, it just brushed right off with no effort. This isn't going to be good attack ammo by any means because it's too dry and soft to hold together in a snow ball.
Across the street, there is a house that burned up a few weeks ago. One minute, it was there, as it had been for about 100 years, quaint, old, stately and charming. I passed it that morning and never thought a thing about it or the people that lived there. A hour later, at the sound of sirens and shouting, I looked out to see that it had turned into a bonfire, flames shooting out the roof, already beyond saving. That quick... Fortunately, everyone inside escaped unharmed, at least physically, that is, but the house was gutted by the fire, leaving nothing but the bare bones of the structure, black and empty and sad.
This morning, however, the snow is covering up those blackened bones and the house is becoming white again. The charred tin roof is clean again. The yard full of dead branches and trash from the burning is hidden under the growing blanket of newness. The ugly is camoflaged by the beautiful. Just for now, the fire, the loss, the sadness, the reality is mercifully covered.
I had a whole year sort of like that house a while back. Everything I expected, everything I'd planned, everything I forcast for the future, went up in flames like that house. The kids and I came out of the experience alive, but only with the memories we carried out the other side with us. Everything else was gone forever. No growing old with my best friend beside me. No dad to watch the kids graduate from high school and hand me a tissue at their weddings. Nobody to argue with and make up with and sit in rocking chairs on the porch with as the fire flies came out at dusk. Life looked alot like that old house across the street...and it felt like it went up in flames about as fast.
And yet, even as the snow that is falling outside right now covers the dead bare ground and the black bones of a ruined old house, a similar miracle happened in my own life. Somehow, someway, God has slowly but surely covered the ugliness inside of me with a blanket of white, a comforting, pure, thick blanket that helps make everything look new again. Yes, I know that, underneath it all, the reality remains and some things can't be made over, but on those days when I start to look too closely at the black bones and see too much loss and too much sadness, the Lord lets loose another round of healing, sort of like shaking up the snow globe again, and His goodness falls on me once more. Sometimes, a whole shower of blessing I know comes from Him. Sometimes, little crystals here and there that just remind me that more is to come. Other times, big fat plops of joy that drop in when I least expect them!
When I remember that He is in control and, no matter what winter and fire try to steal from me, I WILL be o.k. in His timing, it's like that snow outside.
It's a different world...
It's a different world this morning. The view out the window is all white...clean, pure, amazingly white as far as the eye can see. I have to admit that the weatherman got this one spot on! Snow is still pouring down, even as I write. Sometimes, it's coming in bursts of rapidly falling flakes and at other times, huge flakes, big as quarters flutter down, taking their own sweet time to hit the ground. Minute by minute, it piles up, covering everything in a thick flocking of the whitest white there is. I went out to sweep the back door step a little while ago and the snow is so powdery and delicate, it just brushed right off with no effort. This isn't going to be good attack ammo by any means because it's too dry and soft to hold together in a snow ball.
Across the street, there is a house that burned up a few weeks ago. One minute, it was there, as it had been for about 100 years, quaint, old, stately and charming. I passed it that morning and never thought a thing about it or the people that lived there. A hour later, at the sound of sirens and shouting, I looked out to see that it had turned into a bonfire, flames shooting out the roof, already beyond saving. That quick... Fortunately, everyone inside escaped unharmed, at least physically, that is, but the house was gutted by the fire, leaving nothing but the bare bones of the structure, black and empty and sad.
This morning, however, the snow is covering up those blackened bones and the house is becoming white again. The charred tin roof is clean again. The yard full of dead branches and trash from the burning is hidden under the growing blanket of newness. The ugly is camoflaged by the beautiful. Just for now, the fire, the loss, the sadness, the reality is mercifully covered.
I had a whole year sort of like that house a while back. Everything I expected, everything I'd planned, everything I forcast for the future, went up in flames like that house. The kids and I came out of the experience alive, but only with the memories we carried out the other side with us. Everything else was gone forever. No growing old with my best friend beside me. No dad to watch the kids graduate from high school and hand me a tissue at their weddings. Nobody to argue with and make up with and sit in rocking chairs on the porch with as the fire flies came out at dusk. Life looked alot like that old house across the street...and it felt like it went up in flames about as fast.
And yet, even as the snow that is falling outside right now covers the dead bare ground and the black bones of a ruined old house, a similar miracle happened in my own life. Somehow, someway, God has slowly but surely covered the ugliness inside of me with a blanket of white, a comforting, pure, thick blanket that helps make everything look new again. Yes, I know that, underneath it all, the reality remains and some things can't be made over, but on those days when I start to look too closely at the black bones and see too much loss and too much sadness, the Lord lets loose another round of healing, sort of like shaking up the snow globe again, and His goodness falls on me once more. Sometimes, a whole shower of blessing I know comes from Him. Sometimes, little crystals here and there that just remind me that more is to come. Other times, big fat plops of joy that drop in when I least expect them!
When I remember that He is in control and, no matter what winter and fire try to steal from me, I WILL be o.k. in His timing, it's like that snow outside.
It's a different world...
Friday, January 29, 2010
Talking to myself
I am learning that I sort of like life in the 21st century, particularly as a middle-aged woman with too much time on her hands. A hundred years ago, I would have had all these ideas and musings rattling around in my brain, brilliant thoughts and sparkling wit...but would have had no outlet for them, beyond driving my family to distraction. Sadly, I would have gone down to my grave with all these lofty, important thoughts still locked in my brain. Now, thanks to the miracle of the internet, I can sit down at my computer (instead of doing the laundry, dishes, etc.) and let my fingers roam the keys. The flood gates open and out tumble my opinions, like litter on the side of the road, where people passing by MIGHT pick them up and wonder what to do with them--or might just shake their heads and mutter, "Such a shame that people toss their useless junk out the window."
In any event, I think I think too much. I watch too much news, read too many magazines, and ponder too many things. My brain becomes seriously constipated at times, weighed down with both the significant and the trivial, all bumping around into each other in my brain, like folks at a cocktail party after the bar's been open for an hour or two. Eventually, somebody is going to have to go home, or things are going to get unmanageable. Maybe the concept of a "blog" is simply a polite way of showing the door to ideas who have had one-too-many and need to go somewhere and sleep it off.
Perhaps, if I spill some of these ideas out of my head and on to the information super highway, they will either pick up a ride with somebody else and go on to do something constructive elsewhere...or they will be flattened by a semi driven by someone with much higher ideas than mine and they will get the quick death they deserve.
Either way, it's better than the dishes and laundry any day!!
In any event, I think I think too much. I watch too much news, read too many magazines, and ponder too many things. My brain becomes seriously constipated at times, weighed down with both the significant and the trivial, all bumping around into each other in my brain, like folks at a cocktail party after the bar's been open for an hour or two. Eventually, somebody is going to have to go home, or things are going to get unmanageable. Maybe the concept of a "blog" is simply a polite way of showing the door to ideas who have had one-too-many and need to go somewhere and sleep it off.
Perhaps, if I spill some of these ideas out of my head and on to the information super highway, they will either pick up a ride with somebody else and go on to do something constructive elsewhere...or they will be flattened by a semi driven by someone with much higher ideas than mine and they will get the quick death they deserve.
Either way, it's better than the dishes and laundry any day!!
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